interesting read

(taken from an email)

Pain of a married man !!!!!
==================
A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in bed.

She goes downstairs to look for him. She finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in front of him.

He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wipes a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee.

"What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room.
"Why are you down here at this time of night?"

The husband looks up from his coffee, "Do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 18?" he asks solemnly. "Yes I do" she replies.

The husband pauses; the words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the garden?"

"Yes, I remember" said the wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him.

The husband continued.. "Do you remember when he showed the shotgun in my face and said, 'Either you marry my daughter, or I'll send you to jail for 20 years?"

"I remember that too" she replied softly.

He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "I would have been released today !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

काँच की बरनी और दो कप चाय

जीवन में जब सब कुछ एक साथ और जल्दी - जल्दी करने की इच्छा होती है , सब कुछ तेजी से पा लेने की इच्छा होती है , और हमें लगने लगता है कि दिन के चौबीस घंटे भी कम पड़ते हैं , उस समय ये बोध कथा , "काँच की बरनी और दो कप चाय" हमें याद आती है।

दर्शनशास्त्र के एक प्रोफ़ेसर कक्षा में आये और उन्होंने छात्रों से कहा कि वे आज जीवन का एक महत्वपूर्ण पाठ पढाने वाले हैं ...

उन्होंने अपने साथ लाई एक काँच की बडी़ बरनी ( जार ) टेबल पर रखा और उसमें टेबल टेनिस की गेंदें डालने लगे और तब तक डालते रहे जब तक कि उसमें एक भी गेंद समाने की जगह नहीं बची... उन्होंने छात्रों से पूछा - क्या बरनी पूरी भर गई ? हाँ ... आवाज आई ...

फ़िर प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने छोटे - छोटे कंकर उसमें भरने शुरु किये धीरे - धीरे बरनी को हिलाया तो काफ़ी सारे कंकर उसमें जहाँ जगह खाली थी , समा गये , फ़िर से प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने पूछा , क्या अब बरनी भर गई है, छात्रों ने एक बार फ़िर हाँ ... कहा

अब प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने रेत की थैली से हौले - हौले उस बरनी में रेत डालना शुरु किया , वह रेत भी उस जार में जहाँ संभव था बैठ गई, अब छात्र अपनी नादानी पर हँसे... फ़िर प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने पूछा , क्यों अब तो यह बरनी पूरी भर गई ना ? हाँ… अब तो पूरी भर गई है .. सभी ने एक स्वर में कहा ..

सर ने टेबल के नीचे से चाय के दो कप निकालकर उसमें की चाय जार में डाली , चाय भी रेत के बीच स्थित थोडी़ सी जगह में सोख ली गई ...

प्रोफ़ेसर साहब ने गंभीर आवाज में समझाना शुरु किया –

इस काँच की बरनी को तुम लोग अपना जीवन समझो ....टेबल टेनिस की गेंदें सबसे महत्वपूर्ण भाग अर्थात भगवान, परिवार, बच्चे, मित्र , स्वास्थ्यऔर शौक हैं, छोटे कंकर मतलब तुम्हारी नौकरी,  कार, बडा़ मकान आदि हैं और रेत का मतलब और भी छोटी - छोटी बेकार सी बातें, मनमुटाव, झगडे़है…

अब यदि तुमने काँच की बरनी में सबसे पहले रेत भरी होती तो टेबल टेनिस की गेंदों और कंकरों के लिये जगह ही नहीं बचती, या कंकर भर दिये होते तो गेंदें नहीं भर पाते, रेत जरूर आ सकती थी..

ठीक यही बात जीवन पर लागू होती है ... यदि तुम छोटी - छोटी बातों के पीछे पडे़ रहोगे और अपनी ऊर्जा उसमें नष्ट करोगे तो तुम्हारे पास मुख्य बातों के लिये अधिक समय नहीं रहेगा ... मन के सुख के लिये क्या जरूरी है ये तुम्हें तय करना है ।

अपने बच्चों के साथ खेलो, बगीचे में पानी डालो, सुबह पत्नी के साथ घूमने निकल जाओ, घर के बेकार सामान को बाहर निकाल फ़ेंको, मेडिकल चेक - अप करवाओ ... टेबल टेनिस गेंदों की फ़िक्र पहले करो, वही महत्वपूर्ण है... पहले तय करो कि क्या जरूरी है... बाकी सब तो रेत है....

छात्र बडे़ ध्यान से सुन रहे थे .. अचानक एक ने पूछा , सर लेकिन आपने यह नहीं बताया कि "चाय के दो कप" क्या हैं ? प्रोफ़ेसर मुस्कुराये, बोले.. मैं सोच ही रहा था कि अभी तक ये सवाल किसी ने क्यों नहीं किया... इसका उत्तर यह है कि, जीवन हमें कितना ही परिपूर्ण और संतुष्ट लगे, लेकिन अपने खास मित्र के साथ दो कप चाय पीने की जगह हमेशा होनी चाहिये।

(अपने खास मित्रों और निकट के व्यक्तियों को यह विचार तत्काल बाँट दो .. मैंने अभी - अभी यही किया है)

A day care centre for husbands

Found this interesting picture on an email. Enjoy!!!!

pic. A day care centre for husbands

Friendship Day

This post is for you. Feelings are mine but content is copied from an email.

खुदा से क्या मांगू तेरे वास्ते
सदा खुशियों से भरे हों तेरे रास्ते
हंसी तेरे चेहरे पे रहे इस तरह
खुशबू फूल का साथ निभाती है जिस तरह
सुख इतना मिले की तू दुःख को तरसे
पैसा शोहरत इज्ज़त रात दिन बरसे
आसमा हों या ज़मीन हर तरफ तेरा नाम हों
महकती हुई सुबह और लहलहाती शाम हो
तेरी कोशिश को कामयाबी की आदत हो जाये
सारा जग थम जाये तू जब भी गए
कभी कोई परेशानी तुझे न सताए
रात के अँधेरे में भी तू सदा चमचमाए
दुआ ये मेरी कुबूल हो जाये
खुशियाँ तेरे दर से न जाये
इक छोटी सी अर्जी है मान लेना
हम भी तेरे दोस्त हैं ये जान लेना
खुशियों में चाहे हम याद आए न आए
पर जब भी ज़रूरत पड़े हमारा नाम लेना
इस जहाँ में होंगे तो ज़रूर आएंगे
दोस्ती मरते दम तक निभाएंगे

 

FIFA 2010

Well, while everyone is trying to predict the outcome of games at FIFA 2010, I am also trying my hand in this. My favourites are Argentina, but since the Octopus(Paul) has predicted Argentina losing to Germany, I am rooting for Ghana. Are you surprised? Please be.
If Argentina would be able to go past Germany, then my take would be on Span. Don't ask me why, just follow the tornament.

Love letter from an ex lover

Found an interesting piece of love letter. Hope you will enjoy this.

 

Eggpressions - V

This is the last post on featuring Eggpressions. Hope you liked them.

Who is next?

Don’t mess with me.

Eggpressions – IV

Kabhi khushi ……

….. Kabhi Gam.

Aur kabhi sab kuch.

Eggpressions -III

Don’t eat us!

taking bath?

Eggcident!

Eggpressions - II

Don’t hit me!

Is this a classroom?

Losing a friend?

Eggpressions - I

These lovely drawings on eggs are taken from an email. Hope you will enjoy them.

White Mischief

Happy Go Lucky

    Yellow

More to follow in upcoming posts.

5.5 Control Scope

Monitoring and Controlling, Scope Management

Monitoring the status of the project and product scope and managing changes to the scope baseline. This ensures that all the changes and corrective/ preventive actions are processed through the Perform Integrated Change Control process.

Inputs:

· Project Management Plan

- Scope Baseline

For comparing if a change, corrective or preventive action is required.

- Scope Management Plan

For controlling and managing scope.

- Change Management Plan – For managing change.

- Configuration Management Plan – defines the items which are configurable, those items which require formal change control and the process of controlling these items.

· Work Performance Information

Information on project’s progress, status of deliverables, if they are started, on progress or finished.

· Requirements Documentation

· Requirements Traceability Matrix

· OPAs

Tools and Techniques:

· Variance Analysis

Used to assess the magnitude of variation from original scope baseline. Important aspects of project scope control include determining the cause and variance relative to the scope baseline. Also, deciding whether the corrective or preventive action is required.

Outputs:

· Work Performance Measurements

Measurements of planned v actual technical performance. This information is documented and communicated to stakeholders.

· OPA Updates

Cause of variance

Corrective action taken and reasons

Lessons learned from project scope control.

· Change Requests

· Project Management Plan updates

Scope baseline updates

Other baseline updates

· Project Document updates

Requirements documentation

Requirements traceability matrix

5.3 Create WBS

Planning, Scope Management

Top down approach to divide project deliverables and work into smaller, more manageable components. The WBS organizes and defines the total scope of the project, and represents the work specified in the current approved project scope statement. This is deliverable oriented approach and includes project scope, product scope and project management efforts. This is created with help of the team under the leadership of Project Manager.

Control Account: Used to estimate costs from a higher level. (Not at work package level.)

Notes: Normally, first level of decomposition is project life cycle, but there are other approaches such as major deliverables/ subprojects (outsourcing) at level1. WBS is also used as a communication tool. This can be also be used as a team building activity.

WBS can be used to: evaluate scope change, control scope creep, comms tool, role mapping. It doesn’t show dependencies.

Inputs:

Project Scope Statement

Requirements Documentation

OPAs

Tools and Techniques:

Decomposition

The WBS can be created with following approaches:

1. Phases of Project Life cycle as first level of decomposition.

2. Major Deliverables as first level of decomposition.

3. Using subprojects which may be developed outside of the team. (Contracts, Outsourcing)

The project team waits till the deliverable or subproject is clarified before WBS can be developed. This technique is referred as ‘rolling wave planning’. Decomposition is not possible that will be accomplished far into the future.

WBS represents all product and project work, including the project management work. The total of the work at the lowest levels must roll up to higher levels so that nothing is left out and no extra work is completed. This is also referred to as a 100% rule.

Outputs:

WBS

WBS Dictionary – used to prevent scope creep.

Scope Baseline – Project Scope Statement, WBS and WBS dictionary.

Project Document Updates – such as Requirements Documentation, when approved change requests result from Create WBS process.

5.2 Define Scope

Planning, Scope Management

Developing detailed description of project and product. Builds upon the major deliverables, assumptions and constraints documented during project initiation. Analysis of existing risks, assumptions and constraints are done for completeness and additional risks, assumptions and constraints are added, if necessary.

Inputs:

Project Charter – See 4.1

Requirements Documentation – See 5.1.3.1

OPAs

Tools and Techniques

Expert Judgment – May be available from following sources:

- Other Units within the organization.

- Consultants

- Stakeholders, including customer or sponsor.

- Professional and technical associations.

- Industry Groups and

- Subject Matter Experts.

Product Analysis – Can be an effective tool, where product is a deliverable rather than a service or result. Techniques such as product breakdown, system analysis, requirements analysis, systems engineering, value engineering and value analysis can be used for product analysis.

Alternatives Identification – Generating different approaches to execute and perform project work. Techniques such as brainstorming lateral thinking and pair wise comparison.

Facilitated Workshops

Outputs

Project Scope Statement

- Product Scope Description

- Product acceptance criteria

- Project Deliverables – deliverables which comprise the product or service of the project as well as ancillary results, such as PM reports and documentation.

- Project Exclusions – helps in managing stakeholder expectations.

- Project Constraints – contractual provisions, may be listed in a separate log.

- Project Assumptions – impact when assumptions proved to be false.

Project Document Updates

- Stakeholder register

- Requirements documentation

- Requirements Traceability matrix

5.1 Collect Requirements

Planning, Scope Management

Defining and documenting stakeholder needs. Requirements include quantified and documented needs and expectations of the sponsor, customer and other stakeholders. Requirements become the basis of WBS, Cost, Schedule and Quality Planning.

Inputs:

Project Charter – Output from 4.1

Stakeholder Register – Output from 10.1

Tools and Techniques

Interviews – Direct with stakeholders/ subject matter experts.

Focus Groups – prequalified stakeholders and subject matter experts with help of trained moderator.

Facilitated Workshops –

JAD – Joint Application Development

QFD – Quality Function Deployment (product development) using VOC – voice of customer.

Group Creativity Techniques

- Brainstrorming

- Nominal Group Technique – Brainstorming with voting process.

- The Delphi Technique – Questionnaires from Experts to facilitator, anonymity

- Idea/ Mind Mapping – Ideas from brainstorming consolidated to a map. Looks like several trees are generated from a core word.

- Affinity Diagram - ideas sorted into groups. Helps in identifying additional scope/ risks, not identified earlier.

- Questionnaire’s and Surveys – not in PMBOK

- Observation

- Prototypes

Group Decision Making Techniques

- Unanimity

- Majority

- Plurality – largest block and majority not achieved aka single largest party.

- Dictatoship

Questionnaires and Surveys

Observations

Prototypes

Outputs

Requirements Documentation

Requirements Management Plan

Requirements Traceability Matrix

Google Finance

Today this is directing to .hk site. I cannot use this. Wonder if this is a bug or any developer has hardcoded the url for redirection.
Hoping that I am not the only one facing this problem.

Interesting read

This interesting article is taken from an email. Enjoy reading..
NINE WORDS WOMEN USE
(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are
right and you need to shut up.
(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour.
Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more
minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and
you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end
in fine.
(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!
(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often
misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and
wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you
about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)
(6) That's OK: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can
make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before
deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say
you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she
says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at
all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever'). LOL
(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying @#$@% YOU!
(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning
this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is
now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's
wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Unlucky Tendulkar and Hawkeye

Well, it has refreshed the memory of old days (about ten years), when Indian batting revolved around him and once he got out, resistance seemed to be sucked out from Indian Batting line up. Today, when it looked that He might carry India into a position of safety, Mr Harris spoiled it.

I have compiled some reactions to his dismissal. Don't feel good about writing this post. Remembering about Semi final World Cup dismissal to Sanath Jayasuriya. India managed 120 -8 and Tendulkar  made about 66-67.

67.2 Harris to Tendulkar, OUT, 82.9 kph, Harris has struck! What a wicket. And that over the wicket and outside leg stump line has worked again. The little big man of Indian cricket has fallen after a fine hundred. It landed outside leg stump on a length, Tendulkar went for the sweep, the ball turned in, bounced off the thigh pad, went on to the elbow guard and fell on the stumps. Harris can't believe it, he runs around in sheer joy and falls flat on his back on the ground even as the team-mates crowd him. What a moment.

Jerome rubs it in : "where are those harris critics now? "

Jaco du Toit: "I guess I have to apologise to Harris. What do I know?. Just your regular sideline coach it seems.."

Tiaan: "About the whole Harris argument.....all I am saying is...he got lucky with Tendulkar's wicket,..one Swallow does not make a summer."

Sarang: "Harris is acting like a bowling machine that is pitching the ball in the rough outside the legstump. All 3 wickets he got were because of variable bounce and not due to his contribution. He is not changing line or length."

Tendulkar didn't leave the crease for a while. He couldn't believe the ball had gone behind him to hit the stumps. He shook his head, and shook his head again, stood there for a while in utter disappointment before he slowly trudged off.

cricinfo has introduced a new feature under the name of Hawkeye, but it is different from what you see on telly.

घ

घ 

 हिंदी भाषा का यह अक्षर नेतरहाट के सन्दर्भ में एक विशेष अर्थ ग्रहण कर लेता है और एक क्रिया की तरह उपयोग किया जाता है.  आखिर कर घ है क्या? सीधें शब्दों में घ का अर्थ खाना - छात्रों को मिलने वाला खाना खाना - घट जाना होता है. किन्तु यह घ होता नहीं, किया जाता है.
इसके मूल में कारण कुछ भी हो सकता है. मसलन श्रीमान जी से किसी बात पे डांट पड़ जाना, कक्षा डक करने और पकड़े जाने पर भड़ास निकलने के लिए घ करवाना. लेकिन यह काम कोई वरीय छात्र ही करवा सकता है.
परन्तु सबसे ज्यादा घ के होने के पीछे कारण खाना का स्तर घटना होता है और घ होना एक संकेत होता है की खाने का स्तर में सुधार की आवश्यकता है.
अपनी आवाज़ उठाने के और भी तरीके होते हैं नेतरहाट में. उदहारण के तौर पे बगान उजाड़ना जिसके बारे में फिर कभी बताया जाएगा.

Facebook overtaking Orkut?

Here is an interesting article which may be showing a trend whether competition to Google is catching up in online arena. According to data, the rate at which facebook users are growing, may soon lead to Facebook overtaking Google.
There may be some substance to the news, as I find my ex boss on facebook but never found him on Orkut.
May be this is start of the phenom which MS has faced when Google launched its search engine. 
And I am writing this on a Google's site :-)


Read the full article HERE

Ponting's Pair.

I was just reading a column on Cricinfo where a reader asked whether Ponting has ever scored a pair. I was wondering about the India V Australia series(Laxman's) in 2001, where Ponting did not score too many runs. So I did some digging and could not find a test where Ponting made a pair, but he indeed got out for duck in two consecutive innings, Kolkata test's second innings and Chennai test's first innings.
Any guesses as who was getting him out during that series???

Bihari Boli Ki Jai Ho

Thanks to information provided by a reader, according to him, this post is written by senior Bihari journalist Giridhar Jha. It appeared on the front page of the Patna edition of Hindustan Times on August 22, 2000.

Bamakiye mat, say teengo cheers to hamra boli ! LE BALAIYA, ee ka hua ? Kahe albalaye huye hain ? Etna narbhasane se kuchchho nahin hoga ... 

The inveterate linguist may scream at such an apparent contamination of Hindi language but the average Bihari simply loves to throw all narrow parameters of grammar to the winds. For them, the funnier they are, the better their adaptability is into their inimitable lingua franca.

Over the years, Biharis have invented a language, which has an unmistakable stamp of their own. In recent times, its popularity has travelled far and wide beyond the borders of the State and many screen heroes, including Amitabh Bachchan, have mouthed Bihari cliches with characteristic élan - a far cry from the days when it was thought to be an infra dig of sorts for anybody other than country bumpkins and unscrupulous politicians to perpetrate such "verbal atrocities".

All that, however, is passe now.

Bihari Boli is sweeter than honey now not only in Bollywood but also on the campuses of prestigious universities and IITs across the country.

Words like harbaraye, garbaraye, bargalaye, thartharaye and dhanmanaye which would have sounded Greek to outsiders earlier are being used with gay abandon by the hep youngsters there.

Sobriquets laced with double entendres like garda, bawaal and dhuan denoting the varying degree of a girl's beauty and sex appeal can be heard not only in Patna University colleges but also faraway Ferguson College in Pune.

Moreover, a-go, dugo, teengo and chaartho type of numerology which was a matter of disdain not long ago is being accepted even by the stiff upper-lips without any qualms.

So, notes sarka do, batti buta do, Principal ko harka do, burbak kahin ka, hum to biga gaye and Hum to huan thebe kiye theare some of the expressions which have conveniently made their way into the otherwise prim-and-propah St Stephens, New Delhi.

Similarly, expressions like dhakiyaye, mukiyaye, and latiyaye are the current rage. Hiyan, huan, kahe, enne and onne are some typical words, which are spoken rather nonchalantly by so-called educated lot in the State. One, therefore, does not get surprised if one hears tanikke for little, nimman for good, anhar for darkness and ejot for lights. For them, colloquial language need not be tied to any narrow rules. Eee topicwa par maatha khapane se kuchchho nahi hoga!

Among many characteristics of this language are its terms of endearment. Seldom does one hear people on the streets calling each other by their real names. Raju automatically becomes Rajua, Pappu turns into Pappua, Manish to Maniswa, Rajesh into Rajeswa and Shatrughan at best Satrohna.

Biharis have also coined new terms for human anatomy which would baffle an FRCP - gor means legs, moori is head, ongree is finger, thor denotes lips and kapar is forehead.

This language also has more onomatopoeic words than probably any other.Words like tapak se, gapak se, and japak se can be understood by listening to their phonetical sounds. No longer is Bihari language associated with a few howlers like eskool(school), teesan (station) and singal (signal) only.

There are certain words which carry the precise meaning but which cannot be properly substituted by any word in other languages. Machchar bhambhor liya is one such. Bhambhorna is a super word, which means the collective assault of mosquitoes to bhambhor you.

There is another all purpose word which can mean anything - ethi! It is a saviour for those whose vocabulary fails at the crucial momment during conversation. It helps the person who stammers also - wherein he says ethi and cuts short his dialogue. The beauty of it all is that whilst the speaker for want of the precise word says Ethi the listner promptly understands what the speaker means and says theek ba.

The time has certainly come to raise ekadhgo (one or two) toast to the longevity of the Bihari language.

Teengo cheers to that!

Would love to have your COMMENTWA!!!!!

बिहार स्पेशल शब्दकोष

पेश है शब्दकोश के कुछ जाने-पहचाने शब्द:

कपड़ा फींच\खींच लो, बरतन मईंस लो, ललुआ, ख़चड़ा,
 खच्चड़, ऐहो, सूना न, ले लोट्टा, ढ़हलेल,सोटा, धुत्त मड़दे,
 ए गो, दू गो, तीन गो, भकलोल, बकलाहा, का रे, टीशन (स्टेशन),
चमेटा (  थप्पड़), ससपेन (स्सपेंस), हम तो अकबका (चौंक) गए
, जोन है सोन, जे हे से कि, कहाँ गए थे आज  शमावा (शाम) को?,
 गैया को हाँक दो, का भैया का हाल चाल बा, बत्तिया बुता
(बुझा) दे, सक-पका गए, और एक ठो रोटी दो, कपाड़ (सिर),
तेंदुलकरवा गर्दा मचा दिया, धुर् महराज,अरे बाप रे बाप
, हौओ देखा (वो भी देखो), ऐने आवा हो (इधर आओ),
टरका दो (टालमटोल),का हो मरदे, लैकियन (लड़कियाँ),
लंपट, लटकले तो गेले बेटा (ट्रक के पीछे),
 की होलो रे (क्या हुआ रे), चट्टी (चप्पल), काजक (कागज़),
रेसका (रिक्सा), ए गजोधर, बुझला बबुआ (समझे बाबू),
सुनत बाड़े रे (सुनते हो), फलनवाँ-चिलनवाँ, कीन दो (ख़रीद दो),
 कचकाड़ा (प्लास्टिक), चिमचिमी (पोलिथिन बैग), हरासंख,
 चटाई या पटिया, खटिया, बनरवा (बंदर), जा झाड़ के,
पतरसुक्खा (दुबला-पतला आदमी), ढ़िबरी, चुनौटी,
 बेंग (मेंढ़क), नरेट्टी (गरदन) चीप दो, कनगोजर,
 गाछ (पेड़), गुमटी (पान का दुकान), अंगा या बूशर्ट (कमीज़),
 चमड़चिट्ट, लकड़सुंघा, गमछा, लुंगी, अरे तोरी के,
 अइजे (यहीं पर), हहड़ना (अनाथ), का कीजिएगा (क्या करेंगे),
दुल्हिन (दुलहन), खिसियाना (गुस्सा करना), दू सौ हो गया,
 बोड़हनझट्टी, लफुआ (लोफर), फर्सटिया जाना, मोछ कबड़ा,
 थेथड़लौजी, नरभसिया गए हैं (नरवस), पैना (डंडा),
 इनारा (कुंआ), चरचकिया (फोर व्हीलर), हँसोथना (समेटना),
 खिसियाना (गुस्साना), मेहरारू (बीवी),
 मच्छरवा भमोर लेगा (मच्छर काट लेगा),
टंडेली नहीं करो, ज्यादा बड़-बड़ करोगे तो मुँह पर बकोट (नोंच) लेंगे,
आँख में अंगुली हूर देंगे, चकाचक, ससुर के नाती, लोटा के पनिया,
पियासल (प्यासा), ठूँस अयले (खा लिए), कौंची (क्या) कर रहा है,
 जरलाहा, कचिया-हाँसू, कुच्छो नहीं (कुछ नहीं), अलबलैबे,
 ज्यादा लबड़-लबड़ मत कर, गोरकी (गोरी लड़की), पतरकी (दुबली लड़की),
ऐथी, अमदूर (अमरूद), आमदी (आदमी), सिंघारा (समोसा),
खबसुरत, बोकरादी, भोरे-अन्हारे,ओसारा बहार दो,
 ढ़ूकें, आप केने जा रहे हैं, कौलजवा नहीं जाईएगा, अनठेकानी,
 लंद-फंद दिस् दैट, देखिए ढ़ेर अंग्रेज़ी मत झाड़िए, लंद-फंद देवानंद,
जो रे ससुर, काहे इतना खिसिया रहे हैं मरदे, ठेकुआ,
निमकी, भुतला गए थे, छूछुन्दर, जुआईल, बलवा काहे नहीं कटवाते हैं,
 का हो जीला, ढ़िबड़ीया धुकधुका ता, थेथड़, मिज़ाज लहरा दिया,
टंच माल, भईवा, पाईपवा, तनी-मनी दे दो,तरकारी,
 इ नारंगी में कितना बीया है, अभरी गेंद ऐने आया तो ओने बीग देंगे,
 बदमाशी करबे त नाली में गोत देबौ,
बड़ी भारी है-दिमाग में कुछो नहीं ढ़ूक रहा है,
बिस्कुटिया चाय में बोर-बोर,के खाओ जी, छुच्छे काहे खा रहे हो,
बहुत निम्मन बनाया है, उँघी लग रहा है, काम लटपटा गया
है, बूट फुला दिए हैं, बहिर बकाल, भकचोंधर, नूनू,
सत्तू घोर के पी लो, लौंडा, अलुआ, सुतले रह
गए, माटर साहब, तखनिए से ई माथा खराब कैले है,
एक्के फैट मारबौ कि खुने बोकर देबे, ले
बिलैया – इ का हुआ, सड़िया दो, रोटी में घी चपोड़ ले,
लूड़ (कला), मुड़ई (मूली), उठा के बजाड़ देंगे,
 गोइठा, डेकची, कुसियार (ईख), रमतोरई (भींडी), फटफटिया (राजदूत),
 भात (चावल), नूआ (साड़ी), देखलुक (देखा),
दू थाप देंगे न तो मियाजे़ संट हो जाएगा, बिस्कुट मेहरा गया है,
 जादे अक्खटल न बतिया, एक बैक आ गया और हम धड़फड़ा गए,
 फैमली (पत्नी), बगलवाली (वो), हमरा हौं चाहीं,
भितरगुन्ना, लतखोर, भुईयां में बैठ जाओ, मैया गे,
काहे दाँत चियार रहे हो, गोर बहुत टटा रहा है,
का हीत (हित), निंबुआ दू चार गो मिरची लटका ला चोटी में,
भतार (पति शायद), फोडिंग द कापाड़ एंड भागिंग खेते-खेते,
 मुझौसा, गुलकोंच(ग्लूकोज़)।

कुछ शब्दों को आक्सफोर्ड डिक्शनरी ने भी चुरा लिया है।
 और कुछ बड़ी-बड़ी कंपनियाँ इन शब्दों को  अपनें
ब्रांड के रूप में भी यूज़ कर रही हैं। मसलन

- राजीव – रज्जीवा
- सुशांत – सुशांतवा
- आशीष – अशीषवा
- राजू – रजुआ
- रंजीत – रंजीतवा
- संजय – संजय्या
- अजय – अजय्या
- श्वेता – शवेताबा

कभी-कभी माँ-बाप बच्चे के नाम का सम्मान बचाने के लिए उसके पीछे जी लगा देते
है। लेकिन इसका कतई यह मतलब नहीं कि उनके नाम सुरक्षित रह जाते हैं।
- मनीष जी – मनिषजीवा
- श्याम जी – शामजीवा
- राकेश जी – राकेशाजीवा
अब अपने टाईटिल की दुर्गति देखिए।
- सिंह जी – सिंह जीवा
- झा जी – झौआ
- मिश्रा – मिसरवा
- राय जी – रायजीवा
- मंडल – मंडलबा
- तिवारी – तिवरिया
ऐसे यही भाषा हमारी पहचान भी है और आठ करोड़ प्रवासी-अप्रवासी बिहारियों की
जान भी।

Note: Above is reproduced from an email.

Management Policy

(This is reportedly based on an actual experiment conducted in the U.K.)

Put eight monkeys in a room. In the middle of the room is a ladder, leading to a bunch of bananas hanging from a hook on the ceiling.

Each time a monkey tries to climb the ladder, all the monkeys are sprayed with ice water, which makes them miserable. Soon enough, whenever a monkey attempts to climb the ladder, all of the other monkeys, not wanting to be sprayed, set upon him and beat him up. Soon, none of the eight monkeys ever attempts to climb the ladder.

One of the original monkeys is then removed, and a new monkey is put in the room. Seeing the bananas and the ladder, he wonders why none of the other monkeys are doing the obvious. But undaunted, he immediately begins to climb the ladder.

All the other monkeys fall upon him and beat him silly. He has no idea why.

However, he no longer attempts to climb the ladder.

A second original monkey is removed and replaced. The newcomer again attempts to climb the ladder, but all the other monkeys hammer the crap out of him.

This includes the previous new monkey, who, grateful that he's not on the receiving end this time, participates in the beating because all the other monkeys are doing it. However, he has no idea why he's attacking the new monkey.

One by one, all the original monkeys are replaced. Eight new monkeys are now in the room. None of them have ever been sprayed by ice water. None of them attempt to climb the ladder. All of them will enthusiastically beat up any new monkey who tries, without having any idea why.

And that is how most companies' policies get established.

Note: This is taken from an email.

Will it be or Won't be

Back to my favourite pastime of predicting tomorrow's outcome. Will Sachin be able to complete his century tomorrow after an "ordinary" batting performance from India. Let's see. What I am going guess that if he doesn't complete, then what is the reason. Does he get out or he runs out of partners? Let's see.....

Funny Parrot

 A woman went to a pet shop & immediately 

spotted a large, beautiful parrot..
There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00.

'Why so little,' she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and said,
'Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to
live in a house of Prostitution
and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff.'

The woman thought about this, but decided
she had to have the bird any way.

She took it home and hung the bird's cage up
in her living room and waited for it to say something.

The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said,
'New house, new madam.'
The woman was a bit shocked at the implication,
but then thought 'that's really not so bad.'

When her 2 teenage daughters returned from school
the bird saw and said,
'New house, new madam, new girls.'

The girls and the woman were a bit offended
but then began to laugh about the situation
considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later, the woman's husband Keith
came home from work.

The bird looked at him and said,

'' Hi, Keith!


Note: This is taken from an email

Netarhat - Names of Ashrams

Just a quick post to remember my alma mater. I am going to list all ashrams in Netarhat School.  They were grouped in sets.

Shanti
Gautam
Arun

Anand
Prem
Arjun

Kishore
Ashok
Saket

Vikram
Takshila
Nalanda

Raman
Bose
Bhabha

Arvind
Pradeep
Ramkrishna

Kanva
Kanad
Kapil

Australia - Losing their aura??

 There is probably not a better site today for me in the world of cricket to watch/follow Australia losing. The reason is not because they have dominated the Cricket arena for best part of the last decade and before, but because of the fact that they possess an attitude which does not showcase any sporting spirit. If they are OK kind of winners at best, they are even the worst losers.

Sometimes they use the word agrression to justify the behavior, but to me, its pure frustration and someone did not include the word humble when the Australian cricket manual was being written. Recent example was Shane Watson. We will probably find other examples of extreme behaviour in world of cricket, but we will definitely struggle to find any Australian to be punished as severely after showing indecent behavior.

 

So those who are liking this, please turn on their television tomorrow, because there is not a better sight to see those very men being humbled, who pride themselves in the art of mental distegration.

Panchpurush

When I was reading about Panchkanyas, a thought struck me to create a post with five persons which I think have influenced print and digital media and caught public imagination. I do not have any problem in finding first two of them, not because they are established names and they are specialists in their chosen area, but they are in discussion because they are involved in "not-so-nice" activities in recent past.

The duo which I am talking about is Tiger Woods and our own Narayan Dutt Tiwari, because their deeds are very fresh, but finding other three will require refreshing my memory.

I have found my third member, which is former US president, Bill Clinton. When the news broke out about twelve years ago, he was part of discussion of almost every media. Internet, which was not so mature was filled with his stories and jokes. I remember, then google was not available and blogging was not a concept,but Bill Clinton was probably the most used name on internet.

Now, I am struggling to find other two  names. I could easily pick any example, but I want this list to appear credible, so who I am going to choose?

I found this one with the help of Google. Silvio Berlusconi. Just wondering that this has skipped my attention despite being very recent happening.

This only makes the count to four and as I am struggling to find the fifth name, I don't want to include any name just for the sake of it. Rather, I will leave this to you to suggest me one. Till  then, this post remain incomplete.