Funny Parrot

 A woman went to a pet shop & immediately 

spotted a large, beautiful parrot..
There was a sign on the cage that said $50.00.

'Why so little,' she asked the pet store owner.

The owner looked at her and said,
'Look, I should tell you first that this bird used to
live in a house of Prostitution
and sometimes it says some pretty vulgar stuff.'

The woman thought about this, but decided
she had to have the bird any way.

She took it home and hung the bird's cage up
in her living room and waited for it to say something.

The bird looked around the room, then at her, and said,
'New house, new madam.'
The woman was a bit shocked at the implication,
but then thought 'that's really not so bad.'

When her 2 teenage daughters returned from school
the bird saw and said,
'New house, new madam, new girls.'

The girls and the woman were a bit offended
but then began to laugh about the situation
considering how and where the parrot had been raised.

Moments later, the woman's husband Keith
came home from work.

The bird looked at him and said,

'' Hi, Keith!


Note: This is taken from an email

Netarhat - Names of Ashrams

Just a quick post to remember my alma mater. I am going to list all ashrams in Netarhat School.  They were grouped in sets.

Shanti
Gautam
Arun

Anand
Prem
Arjun

Kishore
Ashok
Saket

Vikram
Takshila
Nalanda

Raman
Bose
Bhabha

Arvind
Pradeep
Ramkrishna

Kanva
Kanad
Kapil

Australia - Losing their aura??

 There is probably not a better site today for me in the world of cricket to watch/follow Australia losing. The reason is not because they have dominated the Cricket arena for best part of the last decade and before, but because of the fact that they possess an attitude which does not showcase any sporting spirit. If they are OK kind of winners at best, they are even the worst losers.

Sometimes they use the word agrression to justify the behavior, but to me, its pure frustration and someone did not include the word humble when the Australian cricket manual was being written. Recent example was Shane Watson. We will probably find other examples of extreme behaviour in world of cricket, but we will definitely struggle to find any Australian to be punished as severely after showing indecent behavior.

 

So those who are liking this, please turn on their television tomorrow, because there is not a better sight to see those very men being humbled, who pride themselves in the art of mental distegration.

Panchpurush

When I was reading about Panchkanyas, a thought struck me to create a post with five persons which I think have influenced print and digital media and caught public imagination. I do not have any problem in finding first two of them, not because they are established names and they are specialists in their chosen area, but they are in discussion because they are involved in "not-so-nice" activities in recent past.

The duo which I am talking about is Tiger Woods and our own Narayan Dutt Tiwari, because their deeds are very fresh, but finding other three will require refreshing my memory.

I have found my third member, which is former US president, Bill Clinton. When the news broke out about twelve years ago, he was part of discussion of almost every media. Internet, which was not so mature was filled with his stories and jokes. I remember, then google was not available and blogging was not a concept,but Bill Clinton was probably the most used name on internet.

Now, I am struggling to find other two  names. I could easily pick any example, but I want this list to appear credible, so who I am going to choose?

I found this one with the help of Google. Silvio Berlusconi. Just wondering that this has skipped my attention despite being very recent happening.

This only makes the count to four and as I am struggling to find the fifth name, I don't want to include any name just for the sake of it. Rather, I will leave this to you to suggest me one. Till  then, this post remain incomplete.

Financial Planning !!!!!!!

Dan was a single man living at home with his widowed father 

and working in the family business.

When he found out he was going to inherit a fortune
when his sickly father died, he decided he needed to find a wife
with whom to share his fortune.

One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the
most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty
took his breath away.

"I may look like just an ordinary man," he said to her, "but soon,
my father will die and I will inherit $200 million."

Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and
three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at financial planning than men.

 Note: This has been taken from an email.

बिहार स्पेशल शब्दकोष

बिहार स्पेशल शब्दकोष

पेश है शब्दकोश के कुछ जाने-पहचाने शब्द:

कपड़ा फींच\खींच लो, बरतन मईंस लो, ललुआ, ख़चड़ा, खच्चड़, ऐहो, सूना न, ले लोट्टा, ढ़हलेल, सोटा, धुत्त मड़दे, ए गो, दू गो, तीन गो, भकलोल, बकलाहा, का रे, टीशन (स्टेशन),

चमेटा (थप्पड़), ससपेन (स्सपेंस), हम तो अकबका (चौंक) गए, जोन है सोन, जे हे से कि, कहाँ गए थे आज  शमावा (शाम) को?, गैया को हाँक दो, का भैया का हाल चाल बा, बत्तिया बुता (बुझा) दे, सक-पका गए, और एक ठो रोटी दो, कपाड़ (सिर), तेंदुलकरवा गर्दा मचा दिया, धुर् महराज, अरे बाप रे बाप, हौओ देखा (वो भी देखो), ऐने आवा हो (इधर आओ), टरका दो टालमटोल), का हो मरदे, लैकियन (लड़कियाँ), लंपट, लटकले तो गेले बेटा (ट्रक के पीछे), की होलो रे (क्या हुआ रे), चट्टी (चप्पल), काजक (कागज़), रेसका (रिक्सा), ए गजोधर, बुझला बबुआ (समझे बाबू), सुनत बाड़े रे (सुनते हो), फलनवाँ-चिलनवाँ, कीन दो (ख़रीद दो), कचकाड़ा (प्लास्टिक), चिमचिमी (पोलिथिन बैग), हरासंख, चटाई या पटिया, खटिया, बनरवा (बंदर), जा झाड़ के, पतरसुक्खा (दुबला-पतला आदमी), ढ़िबरी, चुनौटी, बेंग (मेंढ़क), नरेट्टी (गरदन) चीप दो, कनगोजर, गाछ (पेड़), गुमटी (पान का दुकान), अंगा या बूशर्ट (कमीज़), चमड़चिट्ट, लकड़सुंघा, गमछा, लुंगी, अरे तोरी के, अइजे (यहीं पर), हहड़ना (अनाथ), का कीजिएगा (क्या करेंगे), दुल्हिन (दुलहन), खिसियाना (गुस्सा करना), दू सौ हो गया, बोड़हनझट्टी, लफुआ (लोफर), फर्सटिया जाना, मोछ कबड़ा, थेथड़लौजी, नरभसिया गए हैं (नरवस), पैना (डंडा), इनारा (कुंआ), चरचकिया (फोर व्हीलर), हँसोथना (समेटना), खिसियाना (गुस्साना), मेहरारू (बीवी), मच्छरवा भमोर लेगा (मच्छर काट लेगा), टंडेली नहीं करो, ज्यादा बड़-बड़ करोगे तो मुँह पर बकोट (नोंच) लेंगे, आँख में अंगुली हूर देंगे, चकाचक, ससुर के नाती, लोटा के पनिया, पियासल (प्यासा), ठूँस अयले (खा लिए), कौंची (क्या) कर रहा है, जरलाहा, कचिया-हाँसू, कुच्छो नहीं (कुछ नहीं), अलबलैबे, ज्यादा लबड़-लबड़ मत कर, गोरकी (गोरी लड़की), पतरकी (दुबली लड़की),ऐथी, अमदूर (अमरूद), आमदी (आदमी), सिंघारा (समोसा), खबसुरत, बोकरादी, भोरे-अन्हारे, ओसारा बहार दो, ढ़ूकें, आप केने जा रहे हैं, कौलजवा नहीं जाईएगा, अनठेकानी, लंद-फंद दिस् दैट, देखिए ढ़ेर अंग्रेज़ी मत झाड़िए, लंद-फंद देवानंद, जो रे ससुर, काहे इतना खिसिया रहे हैं मरदे, ठेकुआ, निमकी, भुतला गए थे, छूछुन्दर, जुआईल, बलवा काहे नहीं कटवाते हैं, का हो जीला, ढ़िबड़ीया धुकधुका ता, थेथड़, मिज़ाज लहरा दिया, टंच माल, भईवा, पाईपवा, तनी-मनी दे दो, तरकारी, इ नारंगी में कितना बीया है, अभरी गेंद ऐने आया तो ओने बीग देंगे, बदमाशी करबे त नाली में गोत देबौ, बड़ी भारी है-दिमाग में कुछो नहीं ढ़ूक रहा है, बिस्कुटिया चाय में बोर-बोर के खाओ जी, छुच्छे काहे खा रहे हो, बहुत निम्मन बनाया है, उँघी लग रहा है, काम लटपटा गया है, बूट फुला दिए हैं, बहिर बकाल, भकचोंधर, नूनू, सत्तू घोर के पी लो, लौंडा, अलुआ, सुतले रह गए, माटर साहब, तखनिए से ई माथा खराब कैले है, एक्के फैट मारबौ कि खुने बोकर देबे, ले बिलैया – इ का हुआ, सड़िया दो, रोटी में घी चपोड़ ले, लूड़ (कला), मुड़ई (मूली), उठा के बजाड़ देंगे, गोइठा, डेकची, कुसियार (ईख), रमतोरई (भींडी), फटफटिया (राजदूत), भात (चावल), नूआ (साड़ी), देखलुक (देखा), दू थाप देंगे न तो मियाजे़ संट हो जाएगा, बिस्कुट मेहरा गया है, जादे अक्खटल न बतिया, एक बैक आ गया और हम धड़फड़ा गए, फैमली (पत्नी), बगलवाली (वो), हमरा हौं चाहीं, भितरगुन्ना, लतखोर, भुईयां में बैठ जाओ, मैया गे, काहे दाँत चियार रहे हो, गोर बहुत टटा रहा है, का हीत (हित), निंबुआ दू चार गो मिरची लटका ला चोटी में, भतार (पति शायद), फोडिंग द कापाड़ एंड भागिंग खेते-खेते, मुझौसा, गुलकोंच(ग्लूकोज़)।

कुछ शब्दों को आक्सफोर्ड डिक्शनरी ने भी चुरा लिया है। और कुछ बड़ी-बड़ी कंपनियाँ इन शब्दों

को  अपनें ब्रांड के रूप में भी यूज़ कर रही हैं। मसलन

- देखलुक – मतलब “देखना” – देख — लुक (Look)

- किनले – मतलब “ख़रीद” – KINLEY (Pepsi Mineral Water)

- पैलियो – मतलब “पाया” – Palio (Fiat’s Car)

- गुच्ची – मतलब “छेद” – Gucci (Fashion Products)

अब बिहार में आपका नाम कैसे बदल जाता है उसकी भी एक बानगी देखिए। यह

इस्टेब्लिस्ड कनवेंशन है कि आपके नाम के पीछे आ, या, वा लगाए बिना वो संपूर्ण नहीं है। मसलन….

- राजीव – रज्जीवा

- सुशांत – सुशांतवा

- आशीष – अशीषवा

- राजू – रजुआ

- रंजीत – रंजीतवा

- संजय – संजय्या

- अजय – अजय्या

- श्वेता – शवेताबा

कभी-कभी माँ-बाप बच्चे के नाम का सम्मान बचाने के लिए उसके पीछे जी लगा देते

है। लेकिन इसका कतई यह मतलब नहीं कि उनके नाम सुरक्षित रह जाते हैं।

- मनीष जी – मनिषजीवा

- श्याम जी – शामजीवा

- राकेश जी – राकेशाजीवा

अब अपने टाईटिल की दुर्गति देखिए।

- सिंह जी – सिंह जीवा

- झा जी – झौआ

- मिश्रा – मिसरवा

- राय जी – रायजीवा

- मंडल – मंडलबा

- तिवारी – तिवरिया

ऐसे यही भाषा हमारी पहचान भी है और आठ करोड़ प्रवासी-अप्रवासी बिहारियों की

जान भी।

Note: Above is reproduced from an email.

This can be also found on Ritesh's blog on wordpress

Virender Sehwag - Cricketer of the decade

Virender Sehwag is rated as the cricketer of the decade by internationally acclaimed sports writers, such as Peter Roebuck and Derek Pringle. This is quite a remarkable achievement for a person who was dropped from Indian team at one point of time. You will not find any other instance in international cricket where a player becomes number one when he was not even a part of playing eleven.

He is known as an impact player and such is his impact that he is already being compared with Vivian Richards for the sheer audacity he seems to possess. Mind you, here he is not compared to The Don, or to Hutton but to the King for the capability of dominating bowlers. Even in the Indian team, there are more prolific run getters in form of Rahul Dravid and Sachin Tendulkar, but even these stalwarts do not possess triple hundreds.

And those who talk of consistency, take this example, all but one of his last 11 century innings, have a score of 150 plus. This statistic is mind boggling for a person attributed of not having good footwork and who relies on hand eye co-ordination.

One last thing, Pringle as indicated that his results are compiled on the basis of statistics only. Howzzzzzzzat???